I just got an email from Apple asking me to fill out an online questionnaire about how I like the “itunes store. Since listing an item with ebay almost one week ago I’ve received two emails from them asking me to fill out a questionnaire on my “ebay experience”. We had to contact Honeywell three weeks ago about a malfunctioning thermostat, and before the replacement unit arrived we received an email asking us to log in and tell us about the service experience. I’m looking at a receipt from Canadian Tire, and one from Staples and another from Home Depot with instructions to go to their website and fill out a questionnaire about my shopping experience and I’ll get a chance to win gift cards. I get those same requests on other receipts all the time. Somewhere in my inbox is a request from Bell Canada asking me for my opinions on a service call I made about an internet problem I was having.
How in the name of Jesus is it possible for all of these businesses to be so completely out of touch with how their staff are doing their jobs that they have to ask ME each and every time I fart in their general direction to devote more energy and time into these poorly run organizations? I mean, the call to Honeywell wasn’t just one call. In fact, over a period of months it was about eight calls, plus three expensive service calls from the Heating technician before I could convince Honeywell that their God-damned thermostat was a piece of shit. Shouldn’t the client history be enough to tell them I’m not the happiest of customers? Hey itunes, I buy the music don’t I? Leave me the hell alone! And Bell… poor, dear, sweet, so out of touch, misguided Bell... How am I supposed to tell which call it is you want me to fill out the questionnaire for since no one in this entire country has ever been able to get a problem with you solved in just one bloody phone call? And with all of these stupid questionnaires has your service improved one eensie teensie bit? No! And to Canadian Tire, Staples, and Home Depot, I’d probably think about filling out your questionnaire but you want me to register with you to answer the questions and I already get your stupid emails so NO!
And what ever happened with just putting the fucking prize in the box of cereal anyway? Now you have to go online and give them every little piece of information about you except the size of your dick to win a fucking hand puppet which you’re never get anyway because they send it to you by Canada Post.
I don’t want your emails, and I don’t want to fill out your stupid questionnaires. If you want something from me, try giving me something… like customer service, some comparable prices, and a little respect and courtesy when I buy your products. Hey… there’s a novel fucking idea don’t you think? Try it, and you might find yourselves not needing to bother people like me with questions you already have the answers for!
How in the name of Jesus is it possible for all of these businesses to be so completely out of touch with how their staff are doing their jobs that they have to ask ME each and every time I fart in their general direction to devote more energy and time into these poorly run organizations? I mean, the call to Honeywell wasn’t just one call. In fact, over a period of months it was about eight calls, plus three expensive service calls from the Heating technician before I could convince Honeywell that their God-damned thermostat was a piece of shit. Shouldn’t the client history be enough to tell them I’m not the happiest of customers? Hey itunes, I buy the music don’t I? Leave me the hell alone! And Bell… poor, dear, sweet, so out of touch, misguided Bell... How am I supposed to tell which call it is you want me to fill out the questionnaire for since no one in this entire country has ever been able to get a problem with you solved in just one bloody phone call? And with all of these stupid questionnaires has your service improved one eensie teensie bit? No! And to Canadian Tire, Staples, and Home Depot, I’d probably think about filling out your questionnaire but you want me to register with you to answer the questions and I already get your stupid emails so NO!
And what ever happened with just putting the fucking prize in the box of cereal anyway? Now you have to go online and give them every little piece of information about you except the size of your dick to win a fucking hand puppet which you’re never get anyway because they send it to you by Canada Post.
I don’t want your emails, and I don’t want to fill out your stupid questionnaires. If you want something from me, try giving me something… like customer service, some comparable prices, and a little respect and courtesy when I buy your products. Hey… there’s a novel fucking idea don’t you think? Try it, and you might find yourselves not needing to bother people like me with questions you already have the answers for!
***** UPDATE *****
I am adding this now because right after posting what is written above, I went to the mailbox and guess what I got? Go ahead... take a guess! There's a letter from my insurance company asking me to till out a QUESTIONNAIRE to tell them how they did with our recent claim with the MINI. How did I NOT see that coming?